When you have deep relationship problems with a woman, you fix it by love bombing her not through honest dialogue, because hurt women are selfish. They don't give a fuck about the pain they caused (hers matters more), and they don't want to hear an analysis of how they fucked up.

Women don't take accountability for the damage they cause. Trying to force them to be accountable for it just makes them less cooperative, because their low stress tolerance means any truthful examination of their mistakes will cause them pain and in turn further instability.

They will simply dismiss, forget or not really absorb what you say if you try being honest, and tell them in a straight way. If you keep pressing it and can prevent her from running away, you will at best get some weak excuses and perhaps an apology. THAT'S *THE BEST* you'll get.

If you can't prevent her from running away, she will just run away.

Women have no sense of honour in thinking "I've hurt this man, I need to make sure he will be alright"

No. She will absorbed in her own pain, you will not even be a consideration.

A woman can love you more than anything on this planet - and she will do this.

And you causing her additional stress by being mad at her and seeking answers only pushes her further away.

She will never meet your needs and right her wrongs.

See why they're beneath us now?

Trying to get my husband a Christmas present: a thread.

My husband is very hard to shop for. He is quite particular and buys everything he wants for himself anyway. But THIS year, he mentioned one thing one time, and it was perfect. All-weather mats for the Jeep. Great!

I'm texting the whole family like I'm pitching a multi-level marketing scheme. I am offering YOU the opportunity to get in on the ground floor and sponsor a floor mat and finally get this man something he actually needs and wants. Let me take this off your Christmas plate.

I have my friend @okmaher order the mats for me so it doesn't show up on the credit card. Oh, we are so clever! Surely, the mats will arrive at my home in a nondescript box just like every other Christmastime order!

Car dealership: Pulls up to the house, knocks on the door, and hands my husband a clear plastic bag full of cargo liner and floor mats. For those who do not know me, I am very invested in surprises, and clearly I need better op-sec. This was a stroke of bad luck.

But I have another Christmas present idea. And this one is EPIC. For those who don't know my story, I was married before, for 4 years to my 1st husband, Jake, who passed away suddenly in 2015. We had a beautiful, sassy 2-year-old daughter and I was pregnant with our second.

#nofgm thread about immediately after I was mutilated . Especially me how I felt. Trigger warning.
So first My body was raging with pain. My soul was crushed. My humanity was protesting

Smell of blood was absolutely engulfing and horrific . I was violently shaking. I i didn't have any control over my body. Every move my body made. It was extra sharp pain which was everywhere. I just wanted my body to stop just for a minute so that I can catch my breath.

Then the cutter is screaming that if I don't stop shaking .my stitched will come out and she will have to stitch me up. But I can't control how my body is reacting,I can't. I cant scream either
My voice is gone from screaming. I am swimming in the river of pain.

I am confused. I can't look at my mother or my unty. I am in so much pain that I pray to die. Cant take it. The Hut is my butchery Hut. The sun hits and the smell of blood is horrific. I can't stop smelling it. I am only 6yrs. Just tender age of
6yrs. I am surrounded

By family yet I am on a desert island just me and my pain. Why I ask in my head
Million thoughts running through my head. Why was I ignored when I scream. What was this .why did it happened. Why am I hurting this much. Million whys no answer

Too many Soldiers have made ONE mistake and received a Hug,

instead of an All-Night Fuck.

HOW TO NEVER FALL INTO THE FRIENDZONE EVER AGAIN:

《《 THREAD 》》

The #1 reason guys get friendzoned?

They aren't physical enough.

They act like one of her girlfriends or g@y friends.

Being Physical-

It's an expression of yourself.

You're not trying to accomplish anything.

you're doing it because YOU want to.

When should you be physical?

As soon as possible.

You don't want be another "girlfriend"

You want to be MAN TO WOMAN.

If you're not Physical,

you're not a Sexual Threat.

Women will vibe with you, but in a very platonic way.

You want her girlfriends to go- "Who is this guy!?"

The easiest way to make a woman come back to you is to hold the door wide open for her when she wants to leave

Go no contact

Don't call

Don't text

Don't hit her up with any new years, happy valentines, merry Christmas, etc

Feeling apathetic, lethargic, or unmotivated? Or, have someone on your team who feels that way? We're always looking for ways to stay focused, but sometimes life can get in the way. Read on for 4 psychological models of motivation👇

Left to fester, loss of interest or job satisfaction can affect the culture of the whole company. So, how can leaders and HR managers motivate an apathetic member of the team?

In this article, we explain four major concepts in psychology: The Motivator Hygiene Theory, the Job Characteristics Model, the Hierarchy of Needs Model, and the PERMA Model.

Theory 1: Motivator Hygiene Theory. Hertzberg claimed that the most important question to ask when trying to ascertain what motivates employees is: “What do employees really want out of their work experience?” He divided motivators into job satisfiers and job dissatisfiers.

Motivating factors (job satisfiers)
are intrinsic motivators, like enjoyment or a sense of accomplishment: achievement, recognition, the work itself, responsibility, advancement, professional development, personal growth, or the flexibility to work from home.

A list of questions and checks to help you see if you should automate a process or not.

I've had a lot of people asking for this.

This is just what I use.

1st half are open-ended questions for exploration
2nd half are rankings for prioritization.

Hope this helps you!

1. Do I understand what I am automating?

Often times we think we are automating a process, but instead, we may be automating a destructive pattern.

Do it manually for a few weeks.

Dont perpetuate bad actions.

Go through the learning as a person, automate what you learned.

Example:

If you are filtering people for hire, and you automate right off the bat, you may automate based on the wrong criteria.

Its better to filter manually, do some calls, have some interviews, and adjust the process a bit until you are automating the right thing.

2. What do I gain?

Automating, just to automate is not useful. It just creates another system to maintain without any upside.

Each automation adds to the complexity of your business process. As complexity increases, so does areas for breakage and unintended consequences.

3. What do I lose?

Every automation results in loss.

Proximity to the process.

You may miss a "regime shift" as things change.

You may lose closeness to your customers and personal interaction.

You miss an understanding of your operation as it grows or changes.

10 Lessons You (And I) Will Learn Too Late

(THREAD)

TW: Abuse

[THREAD] Let's talk about recognizing signs of emotional abuse. For a lot of people, it can be hard to recognize those signs, especially early on, or we may not realize what they were until we have suffered under them and it affected our mental health.

For the most part, people who engage in a lot of emotional abuse won't show it at the very beginning. They need feelings to develop or an attachment to happen in order to be able to show those signs when it is harder for the other person to leave. It can also be progressive.

However, there are some ways to recognize those signs early on. One of the main ones is how these people talk about others they shared a relationship with in the past. If every ex was a bad person or every friendship has issues, then it is generally a bad sign.

This is especially true for men who may badmouth women they have been it by calling them names that are not worth typing. That's a big red flag because it means that this man is likely to be the bad person here. They may be volatile even in their friendships.

They seemingly seem to lose friends quickly and get new ones quickly. This is because these friends may recognize the toxic tendencies of the person and leave them, and they constantly have to integrate with new people that they want to use for one purpose or another.

My 2020 recap

-a thread-

Well, i think this year isn't the hardest, but it's most likely heartbeating.

Feels like when i'm at the highest latitude on a roller coaster, then the gravity suddenly swallowing me, endless.

January was just the rest of 2019 struggle. Such a thesis revision and etc.

February, was a celebration. And also, a new beginning.

Glorious moment covered with a clueless story. When i got my first (but second actually) interview, with one of the most agritech in jkt.

I thought that i was well prepared. But..

2 weeks later, i got rejected. But that's the sweetest one. They kindly having me during the interview session.

All relationship advice that focuses on “doing stuff for each other” is superficial and is unlikely to yield a lasting result. Satisfying each other’s material desire and playing into tropes seen on tv and movies just makes bad relationships feel bearable.

Only when the two people are joined on the basis of the spirit can true understanding of the other be achieved. Genuine compassion between lovers only happens when the fulfillment of material and mental expectations planted in us by the world become secondary to our devotion.

Worldly relationships are just that, worldly. They function only to temporarily relieve the general physical discomforts of existence.

A relationship based on the spirit is one that honours the flesh but is not of it.

When we are willing to put aside our demands of our husbands and wives to soothe attachments or urges, we can begin to build a union based on service and duty to one another. Wherein all needs are still met but the meeting of those needs are no longer the point of being together.

You do things for each other because you aren’t functioning as two separate people with separate needs. When spirits join taking care of one another is synonymous with taking care of oneself.

My happiness is not isolated from my husbands happiness and vice versa.

Our inflated bios, our curated images, our growth addictions, our me-ministries, our carnal networking, our jealous hearts, our talent-idolatry, our unsubtle platform-building, our fear of going unnoticed, our internal scoffing at small things—what have we become?

Why don't we notice anymore? Why don't we care? Do we think Jesus isn't serious? Do we think he's not really coming back? Do we think we won't stand before him?

Do we even stop and think at all anymore, or do we just do what others seem to be doing?

"There is a way that appears to be right, but in the end it leads to death" (Proverbs 14:12).

There are some things that Jesus says that are mysterious. These are not in that category: "Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven" (Matt 5:3). "Those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted" (Matt 23:12).

It's Christmastime. We talk about the manger—dirty! Bethlehem—small! Shepherds—dingy! Mary—disrespected! "No crib for a bed," we sing. "Mild he lays his glory by," we sing. God the Son—blindingly humble! But do we realize this story is the "master story" of the Christian life?

Now Ministering: Pst @AwoguJoel
Topic: Praise in The Storm

#ChurchGRA #Gratitude #MyTurnToShine

In life, we are meant to succeed despite the challenges. They come as storms in your life. This storm can be a season of repeated undesired outcomes.

#ChurchGRA #Gratitude #MyTurnToShine

The Lord goes with you but in it all, you go through Valleys. These valleys are downward moments. That's a part of the journey.

#ChurchGRA #Gratitude #MyTurnToShine

We face shadows in life, no one is exempted from this phase. The storms are capable of pulling tears from our eyes. The shadow of death is not a pleasant experience.

#ChurchGRA #Gratitude #MyTurnToShine

In spite of this, God is with you and He brings us comfort. You need to hold on to that. Even in the storm, God remains with you. Psalms 34:19 assures you of this.

#ChurchGRA #Gratitude #MyTurnToShine

I've taught thousands of people make smart decisions without getting lucky.

Here is a thread on 5 of the biggest reasons we fail to make effective decisions.

1. We’re unintentionally stupid

We like to think that we can rationally compute information like a computer, but we can’t. Cognitive biases explain why we made a bad decision but rarely help us avoiding them. Better to focus on these warning signs something is about to go wrong.

Warning signs you’re about to do unintentionally something stupid: You’re tired. You’re emotional, in a rush, distracted, operating in a group, or working with an authority figure.

The rule: Never make important decisions when you’re tired, emotional, distracted, or in a rush.

2. We solve the wrong problem.

The first person to state the problem rarely has the best insight into the problem. Once a problem is thrown out on the table however, our type-a problem solving nature kicks in and forget to ask if we’re solving the right problem.

Warning signs you’re solving the wrong problem: You let someone else define the problem for you. You’re far away from the problem. You’re thinking about the problem at only one level or through narrow lenses.

The rule: Never let anyone define the problem for you.

every teenager, open this

you’re doing better than you think you are. i’m proud of you, keep going, you’ve got this!🙂

don’t change so people will like you. be yourself & the right people will love the real you

be strong enough to stand alone, smart enough to know when you need help and brave enough to ask for it

worrying about things in the future doesn’t stop them from happening. it just takes away your happiness today

You can always keep track of things like your money and solve certain real-life problems by putting things in an equation and then resolving them.

Knowing the algebra is something that people should do to achieve it to find a good job and for success in college, as well as life. Learn mathematics such as algebra and arithmetic now because as time passes, it becomes more difficult to learn things.

Do the real thing.

Whatever your goal is, do the real thing.

Don't do fake things to prepare for the real thing, while fooling yourself that you're making progress in the real thing.

You're not.

I'll explain to you what I mean.

[THREAD] 👇

Attaching a proposal to a cold email might also do the magic!

Ten tips for writing your research proposal

1. Follow the instructions!

Read and conform to all instructions found on the council website. Make sure that your proposal fits the criteria of the competition.

2. Break down your proposal into point form before writing your first draft.

Based on the total length of the proposal, decide whether you will have headings/subheadings and what they will be (e.g., Introduction, Background Material, Methodology, and so on).

These headings can be selected based on the advice given in the specific award instructions. For each section, lay out in point form what you will discuss.

3. Know your audience.

Describe your research proposal in non-technical terms.

Use clear, plain language and avoid jargon.

Make sure your proposal is free of typographic and grammatical errors.

Remember that, at every level, adjudication committees are multi-disciplinary and will include researchers in fields other than your own.

Therefore, follow the KIS principle – Keep It Simple!

Reviewers like it that way.