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Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig 4 years, 5 months ago 491 views

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So I bought two accounts on your service--one for personal use, and one for business use. Please react, large companies!

Microsoft: WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING OH MY GOD PLEASE KILL ME AND END MY TORMENT

Slack: You're my favorite two daily active users.

Google: Fuck your business account, why would you pay us? What is wrong with you?

LinkedIn: Has either account tried premium?

GitHub: Two accounts? Sure. Okay. Okay. Sure. Your green squares graph is gonna suck.

Amazon: there are disturbing and weird crossovers between them, like your MFA—but nevermind that. Every time you spin up a new AWS account you're New To Us and must be onboarded.

Apple: WTF is a business?!

Twitter: Your account is temporarily restricted.

Dropbox: Would either account be interested in some nonsense that has nothing to do with "a folder, synced everywhere?"

MongoDB: We lost both of your accounts. Oops.

Netflix: Between those two accounts, you currently have 40 profiles spread across all 6 continents we serve. This is... fine.

Oracle: We have no idea what a personal user account might be, but we're going to audit you just the same.

WebEx: Can we take you out to dinner? You're 40% of this quarter's net new sales.

OnlyFans: I'm sorry--did you say a business account? And you're not a sex worker? Can you please explain this to one of our product managers, because we're highly confused.

The IRS: We're going to audit the piss out of you just as soon as we can find an auditor who takes one look at this thread and doesn't quit on the spot.

More from Corey Quinn

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

So this #reinvent eve, I want to talk about "The Mug: A thread featuring this glorious bastard."

I've gotten a few questions to the tune of "what's @awscloud Hambone," "what's this mug you keep talking about" and "what the hell is wrong with you?"

That last one is from my parents, so we'll disregard it.

For #reinvent, AWS is "particular about slides" in the same sense as "an exploding sun is slightly warm." They send out a standardized PowerPoint slide deck template that all speakers are to use. It's usually fairly zany. This year's featured a rando line art drawing of a ham.

It also figured this drawing as well, but you don't make friends with salad.

So I labeled it "AWS Hambone," slapped it on a shirt and wore it for my keynote rebuttal, as one does.

I also inflicted this upon my child, likewise as one does.

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

So there's a lot of confusion about what Parler being kicked off of Amazon Web Services (@awscloud) means. Let me do a quick thread to explain it to folks who aren't deep in the technical weeds...

You use an app (in this case, Parler). There's a web site you can use, and apps you can download onto your phone via Apple and Google. Those three versions of the app all talk to servers (big computers) behind the scenes.

In the Olden Days, getting those servers took months. Then you had to sign deals with companies to host those servers--they take massive amounts of power, they run hot so air conditioning is a big deal, and they need a *lot* of bandwidth.

About 15 years ago or so, Amazon (the online bookstore) had a revelation and started AWS. The idea being that instead of needing tens of thousands of dollars to get those servers built up, and spending months on it, that they would rent you these servers by the hour.

"A credit card and a few clicks of a mouse later" you were basically able to spin up huge numbers of these servers.

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Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

Lest people think I've become too far lost in the Talking Head weeds this past #reinvent week, it's now time for me to livetweet my use of a new AWS service that was announced this week.

You probably get my re:Quinnvent newsletter. Here's the system I built that generates it.

Now that CodeGuru supports Python, let's turn it loose on the "build" subservice. This is a @goserverless stack. The subcomponent features 8 Lambdas function fronted by 11 APIs Gateway.

Yes, let's get started with it!

It starts with the correct option selected. Good for it, bad for CodeCommit's veneer of legitimacy.

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

If people add a letter to FAANG, the added letter is the company they work for.

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

And now a livetweet thread of a legal conference in the case of C21-31-BJR, Parler LLC v. @awscloud.

Parler suggests "AWS just has to flip a switch and Parler gets turned back on. Parler has been their customer for 2.5 years."

"They've met and conferred over some user content that violates not only Parler's user requirements, but also Amazon's." Yes, they'll do that, whether you want them to or not.

"I'm not on social media" says Parler's lawyer. "If I use any terms and you don't understand them, I can explain them your honor." Just go full bro and call it "dumbing things down for you" dude.

They're now saying an "algorithm" can solve their moderation problems.

Spoiler: it can not.

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Carlos E. Perez
@IntuitMachine

The interview with CNBC of @chamath is a much watch because there is so much insight hidden underneath.

There are many things that caught my attention. The one thing was the abstraction that hedge fund strategies are all 'momentum' plays. What it seems to imply is that the marshaling of resources at an opportune time drives the future behavior of a stock.

From basic physics, we know that momentum is mass times velocity. So any 'momentum' tactic employs the variation of mass, velocity or both. Wrt stocks, mass is money and velocity is speed of trade.

We cannot argue that there are benefits of scale associated with having more money. Also, high-frequency trading has shown the value of high-speed trading. So in an abstract sense, market manipulation can involve a kind of momentum play.

The objective of stock trading is to buy a financial instrument at a low price and sell it at a higher price. The purpose of a momentum play is to front-run the decision process of other traders such that one acquires the assets before a decision is made.

Nick Huber
@sweatystartup

If you're new to real estate twitter this is a must-read.

A thread on how most real estate folks structure deals with outside investors.

Most GPs utilize the "preferred equity" structure when they raise money from outside investors. They "syndicate" deals.

Here's the basics:

The person (or team of people) putting the deal together is the "sponsor". Also called general parter. Referred to on twitter as the GP.

They find the property, do all the work, hire the management company and take fees. They often co-sign debt and always secure the financing.

The investor is generally passive, doing no work and putting in cash. This is the "limited partner". Referred to on twitter as the LP.

They don't co-sign debt. They simply read reports and ask the sponsors questions and cash checks every month (if the deal is going well).

There are two equity classes.

"Preferred equity" belongs to the LPs. Cash talks, so this is a higher class of shares. They are first in the "capital stack" behind the debt (bank loan).

"Common equity" belongs to the sponsor. They are generally last in the capital stack.

Sponsors generally co-invest. That means they hold both equity classes. A 10% co-invest is standard.

That means the GP has skin in the game. His 10% co-invest makes him both an LP and a GP.

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Cory Doctorow #BLM
@doctorow

The early Disney company had several near-death experiences, some due to exogenous shocks and some self-inflicted (bad labor practices, weird technology choices), and all through it, a power struggle between "Roy people" (finance) and "Walt people" (tech/art).

1/

After WWII, the company was transformed, with Roy ascendant and financial discipline the order of the day. Walt - who struggled with depression - sought desperately for an escape from the company.

2/

He came up with plans to outfit a train with traveling exhibits that he would drive around the country, putting thousands of miles between him and his brother.

3/

Another plan called for Walt to build an ambitious model train system and transform his role in the company to showing people around his trains.

4/

In 1953, Walt came up with the plan that stuck: a park called "Disneyland" that would be his own fiefdom, a commercial project that would justify the kinds of R&D and experimentation that Walt doted on and Roy looked on as high-risk, potentially ruinous follies.

5/

Irina Dumitrescu
@irinibus

I just keep being surprised by how many people expect all business to run as usual despite the fact that we're into year two of a worldwide pandemic.

Like.... anyone notice how many people's jobs got a ton harder? Or how many people lost their jobs, or the prospect of even being in the running for employment?

Anyone notice how many people now have massively heavier care responsibilities -- for children, parents, elderly relatives and friends, you name it?

Anyone notice the massive, unceasing level of stress that comes from mixed messages coming from govts, bungled safety policies and vaccination plans, endless lockdowns?

Every now and then I see someone miffed that some inessential thing hasn't gone as quickly or as efficiently as they'd have like, and I have to wonder -- are we living on the same planet?

Nik Sharma
@mrsharma

@jspujji @RomeenSheth @ampush @GatewayX Down!

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Shaun Russell
@_ShaunRussell

"I really want to break into Product Management"

make products.

"If only someone would tell me how I can get a startup to notice me."

Make Products.

"I guess it's impossible and I'll never break into the industry."

MAKE PRODUCTS.

Courtesy of @edbrisson's wonderful thread on breaking into comics – https://t.co/TgNblNSCBj – here is why the same applies to Product Management, too.

"I really want to break into comics"

make comics.

"If only someone would tell me how I can get an editor to notice me."

Make Comics.

"I guess it's impossible and I'll never break into the industry."

MAKE COMICS.
— Ed Brisson (@edbrisson) December 4, 2018

There is no better way of learning the craft of product, or proving your potential to employers, than just doing it.

You do not need anybody's permission. We don't have diplomas, nor doctorates. We can barely agree on a single standard of what a Product Manager is supposed to do.

But – there is at least one blindingly obvious industry consensus – a Product Manager makes Products.

And they don't need to be kept at the exact right temperature, given endless resource, or carefully protected in order to do this.

They find their own way.

foone
@Foone

So there's a class of puzzles called "river crossing puzzles" which involve having to cross a river on a boat/bridge containing some set of individuals/items with restrictions on which ones can be on the boat/left on each shore, right?

and the most common subclass of these problems is the one where you have 3 items/animals to cross with.
This is alternatively called the "fox, goose, and bag of beans" or "wolf, goat, and cabbage" puzzle.

the idea is that your boat can only carry one item at a time, but if you leave the wolf/fox unattended with the goat/goose, the wolf/fox will eat the goat/goose.
and similarly, the goose/goat will eat the beans/cabbage if left alone

so you have to set up a set of actions that never leaves either side of the river in one of the lose-states.

the solution to this variant being:
1. take the goat/goose over
2. return empty
3. take the wolf/fox over
4. return with the goat/goose
5. take the cabbage/beans over
6. return empty
7. take the goat/goose over

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Kaspars Ozolins
@lettlander

THREAD: Meditations on marriage metaphors in Ruth

The book of Ruth is, of course, a story about a beautiful marriage. But even before the courtship and the wedding and the important genealogy at the end, we find interesting language that is strikingly reminiscent of Genesis 2:24

That important verse reads:

'Therefore a man shall leave [יַֽעֲזָב] his father and his mother and hold fast [וְדָבַ֣ק] to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.'

The verb עזב can be quite strong in force. For example, Joseph leaves behind [וַיַּעֲזֹ֤ב] his garment as he flees from Pharaoh's wife's sexual advances. Countless times, Israel is depicted abandoning the LORD, for example in Judg 2:12 [וַיַּעַזְב֞וּ], and going after other gods.

Likewise, the verb דבק is rather striking. Lot is mortified of disaster overtaking him [תִּדְבָּקַ֥נִי] as he flees from Sodom. Israel is commanded in Deut 10:20 to cling fast [תִדְבָּ֔ק] to the LORD and serve him and swear by his name.

Together they illustrate how radical God designed marriage to be. Marriage is a real severing of family relations in order to form a new, permanent bond with another human being.

Something very similar to this takes places in Ruth's life.

Robbie Andrew
@robbie_andrew

I doubt there are many outside of Norway that know that the Norwegian pop group A-ha was critical in the introduction of electric car incentives in Norway. I certainly didn't. Read on...

In 1989, two members of the group, Morten Harket and Magne Furuholmen were in Switzerland with environmentalist Frederic Hauge, when they came across a hobby-converted Fiat Panda. Stated range: 45 km. They snapped it up and imported it to Norway.

Photo: In Switzerland (Bellona)

On arrival in Norway, the regs didn't accommodate the registration of electric cars so it couldn't legally be driven on the road. Since it had a propane-fuelled heater, just like a motorhome, they registered it as a motorhome.

Moreover, in contrast to petrol cars, diesel cars paid registration fees based on how far they were driven, and our heroes thought this should also apply to electric cars. So the two-seater Swiss-converted Fiat Panda was registered as a diesel motorhome in Norway.

They managed (somehow) to avoid paying the one-off registration fee in 1990, and ever since then electric cars have been exempted this now-substantial fee.
Source:

Respectable Lawyer
@RespectableLaw

There's been a lot of talk about the missionary killed by the natives of North Sentinel Island. They're probably so aggressive because of this weirdo, Maurice Vidal Portman. So here's a big thread about this creep and some facts from my decade-long obsession with the island.

The Sentinelese are often described as “uncontacted,” but this not strictly true. They had a very significant contact in 1880 with Commander Portman.

Portman, the black sheep third son of some minor noble, was assigned by the English Royal Navy to administer and pacify the Andaman Islands, a job he pursued from 1880-1900 with the full measure of his own perversity.

Portman was erotically obsessed with the Andamanese, and he indulged his passion for photography by kidnapping members of various tribes and posing them in mock-Greek homoerotic compositions.

During his 20 years in a sexualized heart of darkness, Portman measured and cataloged every inch of his prisoner’s bodies, with an obsessive focus on genitals.