Why I Don't Open Up to the People I Love About My Depression

We know something’s wrong! We want to help! We love you! Why can’t you open up to us?”

Because I’m ashamed at how weak I feel.

Because if I expose that weakness to you, you might end up ashamed of me, too.

1/x

Because the last thing I ever want to do is be a weight around your neck.

Because you have your own problems, and your own life to live.

Because it might change the way you see me.

Because it might make you want to treat me with kid gloves, to tiptoe around me because you 2/x
think I might shatter.

Because you might go the opposite route and decide it’s time for some “tough love.”

Because if I hear the words, “there are other people out there a lot worse off than you,” I probably will shatter. I’m aware. That’s part of the problem.

3/x
Because I’ve been here before, and I’ll probably be here again.  It exhausts the hell out of me.  I can only imagine what it would do to you.

Because I’m terrified you’ll blame yourself, when absolutely none of how I’m feeling is your fault.
4/x
Because I love you.
Because I want you to keep loving me.

Because I have an illness that convinces me that’s exactly what will end up happening, no matter how much you say otherwise.
I wish I could make you understand. 5/x
The person you see from the outside doesn’t remotely resemble who I’m seeing on the inside. That person is weak. That person is self-destructive. That person makes all the wrong decisions, and worst of all knows it 6/x
That person is set to fall, and I’ll be damned if he’s going to take anyone I love along for the ride.

That’s why I work so damn hard to hide it. Why I get so upset when the mask slips and you get a glimpse of what’s really going on. 7/x
Why I get angry and lash out when it does, or worse, pull away and collapse into myself. It’s because I’m afraid. Terrified. Terrified that if you see the real me, then it will all be over. You’ll wash your hands of me and go find someone who isn’t broken to spend your time 8/x
with. Someone who doesn’t take as much work. Someone who won’t drain the life out of you.

(Jeremy Michael Wilson)

Die beste Erklärung die je jemand schrieb. Sie trifft so gut.

Der volle Text: https://t.co/miQT92CNxS 9/9

#NotJustSad

More from Life

This month I’m turning 22.

To celebrate, here are the 22 best threads I’ve found on Twitter this year.

Mostly about:

•Life/purpose
•Startups
•Entrepreneurs
•Writing
•Clarity of thought

If I see more interesting threads, I will add to this list.

Enjoy!

1. @ryanstephens: Need tips on growing a newsletter, mastering Twitter, writing online?

@ryanstephens breaks down a podcast discussion between @davidperell and @nathanbarry

Here’s what you can


2. @jackbutcher: How to separate your time from your income

•Explore the market
•Build equity
•Build products and services
•Scale your reputation
•Break the matrix

A fantastic thread complete with helpful


3. @AlexAndBooks_: I love to read.

Here is a great thread on 10 fantastic books.

Includes a short summary of each.

Don’t just take it from me, this is straight from the legend: @AlexAndBooks_


4. @m_franceschetti My biggest revelation in 2020 was the importance of sleep.

Here, @m_franceschetti founder of @eightsleep gives us his eight sleep hacks to improve sleep for 2021.

Do these and your productivity will

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