Here’s a trap I’ve noticed leaders falling in to. And it can be tough to untangle.

People bring problems to them. But not many people ... like 1-2% of the company. So they walk away believing it is a small problem ... “I need to hear from others”.

What is going on? 👇 (1/n)

Convo between @tferriss & @naval on modern loneliness:

Naval: In India there's this concept of the extended family where you basically live with your tribe at all times, so when we were young, at our grandmother's place with my aunts, my uncles, my cousins, my grandparents,

everyone was there, and it was a warm night so we went out to the backyard and put all these comforters and these little cots out and everyone would sleep in this giant pile with fifteen people underneath the stars...

it was amazing...so there's two things that were great about it: the noise level didn't bother you, if someone's foot was in your face it didn't bother you. When it's family and you're young it all just works and you feel very safe and very happy.

Another thing is that it reinforces how important the tribe is. Modern society gives us incredible flexibility in that we can get away from our crazy family members, we're not destined to die where we are born or to do what our parents did. So we have incredible freedom.

But coming with it is this tremendous loneliness that we try to cover up either through drugs, alcohol, partying, even trying to find a mission like putting people on mars. But the reality is that a lot of that loneliness comes from being disconnected from growing up in your

10 Signs of Social Intelligence 🧠

1-Smile
2-Good posture
3-Strong eye contact
4-Fluid hand gestures
5-Let’s others talk more
6-Listens & relates
7-Comfortable Touching people
8-Walk with a swagger
9-Speaks at slower pace
10-Keeps calm under criticism

[ QUICK THREAD ]

1-Smile

How do you feel when you see someone that looks angry?

It’s a downer

No one will want to interact with you if you look pissed all of the time, it’s just negative energy

Plus, smiling is a sign of confidence and boosts others moods

2-Good posture

Don’t walk Into any social setting looking like the hunchback

It’s weak and makes you look low energy

Plus, you’re displaying low status with weak posture

Stand up straight with your chin up & chest out like a god

Walk like you’re proud of yourself

3- Strong eye contact

Ever shake someone’s hand & their eyes are either looking down or darting?

It’s weak & you probably won’t trust them

Or in conversation?

Eye contact while talking means you’re listening and paying *Attention*

Strong eye contact displays confidence

4-Fluid hand gestures

Use your hands to talk & express your points

Don’t stand there like a robot

Using the hands can make what you’re talking about exciting

It can also be used to emphasize

Exciting = positive emotion

Remember, making people FEEL is what’s important

How Reading Helped My Career

 In 2013, a joint venture Israeli/South African company was looking to make a foray into Nigeria. They wanted to set up an outlet in Lagos after conducting their feasibility studies and they needed a Nigerian financial institution to partner with.

Somehow, i was given their contacts and we agreed to meet with our teams from both sides at Victoria Island. 

I got my team together- about 8 of them- people in e-business, IT and other units that I know will have one thing or the other to do with this company.

I wanted to conclude in just one meeting. As the South African MD and his Israeli partner walked into my office where we were all seated and I stood up to exchange pleasantries with both of them, his eye went to the book on my table. 'Oh, you're reading Tipping Point?', he asked.

I was reading Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell that week and I had the book on my desk in the office. I usually have the books I'm reading either in my car or on my desk. I replied in the affirmative.

He asked for other books of Malcolm Gladwell that I've read and I mentioned Outliers-The Story of Success and What The Dog Saw. He asked for my best among the books and I mentioned Outliers. His best was Tipping Point.

10 Life Lessons You Won't Learn Anywhere Else.

Previously, I might have given some lessons I have learnt in 24 Months,

By nature man should learn, adapt and survive,

It's through pain that you learn the greatest secrets of life, things we ignore but really matter,

Which lessons?

Let's see,

1. Be ready to unlearn anything- by unlearning, chances of anything happening are infinite,

People change,

Times change,

Feelings change,

When this happens, take a step back, don't bitch around, feel, heal and move on. Create your reality.

2. Relearn- Your existence is random, nature would be so unfair or fair to have you where you are. It's your life, YOU,

It is what it is, just does not work,

You have to make it work, so you must learn,

Faster to even outrun your capabilities.

3. Every man is intimidated by your success- Your success is ONLY important to anyone if it's beneficial to them in a way. It's not about you, it's about them,

Be careful with heights, it's slippery and way too far down.

How to Network: Must read for shy people

~ Thread ~

1. Start with Whom You Know

Start slow by networking with relatives and friends.

Once you gain some courage, you can expand to strangers too.

2. Put on a Happy Face

SMILE

This is such a basic rule yet people just don't think about it.

3. Listen to be Heard

Everyone wants to talk about themselves.

If you are shy, be a good listener.

If you let them speak, they will remember it as a great conversation

4. Say their Name

People like to hear their own names.

Calling them by their name would make them more comfortable.