Bad news:, everyone: I got my next keyboard

So Sony has this format called Optical Disc Archive, right? It's a high-density storage cartridge, but it turns out it works by cheating.

because if you open it up (which you should never do. trust me on this one)
it turns out... it's blu-ray.

it's a big STACK of blu-ray

And the idea is that Sony built some very complicated drive which you can slot this cartridge into, and it'll open it up and grab out the right disc and just read/write that one

then when you hit the eject button, it shoves the discs back in and closes up the case, and hands you the cartridge.

It is 2018 and this error message is a mistake from 1974.
This limitation, which is still found in the very latest Windows 10, dates back to BEFORE STAR WARS. This bug is as old as Watergate.

When this was developed, nothing had UPC codes yet because they'd just been invented.
Back when this mistake was made, There was only one Phone Company, because they hadn't been broken up yet. Ted Bundy was still on the loose. Babe Ruth's home run record was about to fall.

When this bug was developed, Wheel of Fortune hadn't yet aired. No one had seen Rocky Horror. Steven Spielberg was still a little-known directory of TV films and one box-office disappointment. SNL hadn't aired yet. The Edmund Fitzgerald was still hauling iron ore.

WHEN THIS STUPID MISFEATURE WAS INVENTED, THE GODFATHER PART II HAD JUST OPENED IN THEATERS.

So, why does this happen? So Unix (which was only 5 years old at this point) had the good idea of "everything is a file" which mean you could do things like write to sockets, pipes, the console, etc with the same commands and instructions.

I like how mediawiki exports pages because there's nothing I enjoy more than parsing a 1 gigabyte XML file

and I'm doing simple-english-wiki! it's way smaller than english wikipedia
I can only imagine how impossibly unparsable that nightmare is

fun fact: when programmers need to write code to extract data from an XML file, the process usually goes like this:
1. find XML file
2. open it in a text editor, see what the structure is
3. write some code that parses that

do you really want to open a 1 gigabyte XML file in your text editor?

do you want to fucking die?

I used to run into this problem back when I worked for the government, because sometimes I'd click a database query log (don't ask why our logs were in XML, it's... complicated) and it would turn out to be 100mb

I didn't have a picture handy to post today for my sleep-picture, so here's an old picture of when we brought in our recliner and Babby SCSI thought it was a fun new toy to climb on

she also liked to get in the way of keyboard repair process

her favorite youtuber was @TheCaptainSauce

and sometimes she'd just hang out near the keyboard and be like "why are you reading wikipedia and not PETTING ME?"

sometimes she was unaware that an evil wizard was sneaking up on her

Tonight I'm going to share a special
#ChristmasStory with you. It's based on the story our mamas tell us so that we aren't afraid and bark at Santy Claws. My canine friend Moe & a human named Jodie inspired me to create this as a holiday gift for my Twitter friends.

1/

Please follow along and be patient with me.

Our Story is called:
Moe Knows: A Christmas Tail.

Moe Knows loneliness. 

He was an adorable puppy. Some kind of bully breed mix born just before Christmas. When he was just a little tyke he was bought by a man wanting something
2/

that would grow into a big guard dog. So Moe was taken from his mama & siblings and went to his new home. His first night there he spent alone in a garage with only a thin blanket between him and the floor. Moe cried all night. 

3/

Moe knows cold.

He spent his days chained in a yard and his nights in the garage. Being a mischievous pup, Moe eventually found things in the garage to play with & chew on. This made the man very angry & Moe was no longer allowed to sleep in the garage. He stayed chained

4/

outdoors and huddled under an old truck in the yard to keep out of the wind & keep dry.

5/

"Cancel culture" but pronounced like a pasta: "can-chel-le cul-choor-ay"

Imagine, if you will, a Rigoletto in which the antagonist is cleverly renamed "Canucile Culture"

"The MAD Primer of Bigots, Extremists and Other Loose Ends," from September 1969.

Seen a couple of these panels make the rounds from time to time, so here's the complete set of 10 (something to amuse and/or offend almost everyone).

Chapter 1: The Super Patriot

Chapter 2: The Ku Klux Klansman

Chapter 3: The American Student

Chapter 4: The Right-Wing Extremist