Promising Young Woman has actually given me an idea fora Batman pitch, which I am going to post here since I obviously have no aspirations of ever working for DC Comics. For all I know, it's been done in some elseworlds, but I'm gonna try anyway. (1/x)
We cut to Gotham PD, a few hours later. (9/x)
"Renee, I frankly don't care if some freak in a costume beats up an armed gang. Less our officers have to deal with."
"Jim - he killed [CEO name]. Shot him." (10/x)
"What are you? His defense attorney?"
"No, it just doesn't make any sense. Every single crime he's committed has targeted armed individuals, and has been done with martial arts." (11/x)
"Bank account numbers? He's never asked for anything like that before."
"Probably because street gangs don't have bank accounts." (12/x)
"What the bloody hell happened to you? You let yourself get *shot*?"
"It was bound to happen eventually."
"That's why I keep asking you to *not do this,* Master Bruce." (13/x)
"One step closer," Bruce says. An alert goes off on Alfred's phone.
"Bloody shit," Alfred says after checking it. (14/x)
"You're actually several steps closer, Bruce. To prison."
"What??"
CUT TO outside of Gotham PD, where Susan has left after giving her statement
A man approaches her.
"I don't need condolences from a stranger," Susan says.
"I'm not here to offer those." (15/x)
"I think you've made some false claims about a friend of mine," the man says.
"No, I -"
"I don't agree with Mr. Wayne on the subject of firearms. In fact, I'm quite the enthusiast about... other types of weapons." He draws a throwing star.(17/x)
"My greatest student," R'as al Ghul says. "I won't let his foolish crusade end his potential. So, I'm sorry, my dear..." He throws the ninja weapon. (18/x)
"I have to end it *all*," Bruce says. "My mom might have dodged a knife. My dad might have blocked a punch." (25/x)
"My name is known," Bruce says. "And if you're planning to come along, I don't need any more bodies on my hands." (29/x)
"Never said you were. The difference between us is that I'm willing to own the death I cause. I know a bullet ricochet that misses me and hits a child is the same as if I shot that child. Even lawyers from your world know this." (31/x)
"You think you can end a technology? Going to come for throwing stars next?"
"You know there's no next, R'as."(32/x)
"Nothing can change my fate, R'as." Bruce flips the police cruiser in front of the gun company, crashing into their gardens and sign. (33/x)
"Of course not. The Bat knows how to drive."
Bruce appears behind that guard, disarms his AR-15, and bashes him in the head with the hilt. "I know how to drive *when I need to*."
The random henchman approaches. "Could use some help here," Harley says. "He's gonna get up again." (40/x)
"Not a problem," the henchman says. He fires his Glock. Everything goes black. (41/x)
The next day, Gordon is in his office, being informed charges have to be dropped against basically everyone involved bc Batman/Bruce tainted everything (43/x)
"I'd shoot you right here if he wouldn't hate that," Alfred said.
"No, you wouldn't," R'as says, ninja-ing to demonstrate why. "But you're right. I failed him."
"Would you believe me if I said I did as well?" R'as asks.
"I'd say you should never try again with anyone else, if so."
"I can't argue." (47/x)
More from Culture
I just finished Eric Adler's The Battle of the Classics, and wanted to say something about Joel Christiansen's review linked below. I am not sure what motivates the review (I speculate a bit below), but it gives a very misleading impression of the book. 1/x
The meat of the criticism is that the history Adler gives is insufficiently critical. Adler describes a few figures who had a great influence on how the modern US university was formed. It's certainly critical: it focuses on the social Darwinism of these figures. 2/x
Other insinuations and suggestions in the review seem wildly off the mark, distorted, or inappropriate-- for example, that the book is clickbaity (it is scholarly) or conservative (hardly) or connected to the events at the Capitol (give me a break). 3/x
The core question: in what sense is classics inherently racist? Classics is old. On Adler's account, it begins in ancient Rome and is revived in the Renaissance. Slavery (Christiansen's primary concern) is also very old. Let's say classics is an education for slaveowners. 4/x
It's worth remembering that literacy itself is elite throughout most of this history. Literacy is, then, also the education of slaveowners. We can honor oral and musical traditions without denying that literacy is, generally, good. 5/x
As someone\u2019s who\u2019s read the book, this review strikes me as tremendously unfair. It mostly faults Adler for not writing the book the reviewer wishes he had! https://t.co/pqpt5Ziivj
— Teresa M. Bejan (@tmbejan) January 12, 2021
The meat of the criticism is that the history Adler gives is insufficiently critical. Adler describes a few figures who had a great influence on how the modern US university was formed. It's certainly critical: it focuses on the social Darwinism of these figures. 2/x
Other insinuations and suggestions in the review seem wildly off the mark, distorted, or inappropriate-- for example, that the book is clickbaity (it is scholarly) or conservative (hardly) or connected to the events at the Capitol (give me a break). 3/x
The core question: in what sense is classics inherently racist? Classics is old. On Adler's account, it begins in ancient Rome and is revived in the Renaissance. Slavery (Christiansen's primary concern) is also very old. Let's say classics is an education for slaveowners. 4/x
It's worth remembering that literacy itself is elite throughout most of this history. Literacy is, then, also the education of slaveowners. We can honor oral and musical traditions without denying that literacy is, generally, good. 5/x