Caring deeply makes you vulnerable. Why? Because there's a good chance things don't go exactly your way. But caring deeply is also the key to a rich life.
THREAD: Here are 10 insights I've learned over the last 5 years coaching executives, entrepreneurs, and athletes.
On sustainable success, peak performance, and career advice:
👇👇
Caring deeply makes you vulnerable. Why? Because there's a good chance things don't go exactly your way. But caring deeply is also the key to a rich life.
When you care deeply about something it draws you in. That's the point. You don't need to force some kind of proportionate allocation of your life.
Aim for the self-awareness to PRIORITIZE and CHOOSE how you spend your time and energy.
Expecting to find something where everything clicks from the get go and is all good from there on out is a surefire way to never be happy.
Pursue your interests. Stay curious. Hone a craft. Passion emerges over years, not seconds.
If you develop a mindset, "If I just do this, or just accomplish that, THEN I'll arrive," you're in for trouble. There is no arriving. The human brain didn't evolve for it. Enjoy the process. Be where you are.
Define your values. Craft a life around them. THAT is success.
-Too much of the former not enough of the latter you get injury, illness, burnout.
-Too much of the latter not enough of the former you get complacency, stagnation.
This equation is universal. It holds true for individual and organizational growth.
Books are the best bargain there is. There is no better place to get a deep distillation of insights and wisdom.
I've helped 4-time Olympians move on from sport simply by recommending books. I've helped founders navigate rough waters the same way.
The people with whom you surround yourself shape you. We are all mirrors reflecting onto one another. Ancient wisdom traditions point toward this. Latest research points toward this.
We think too much about individuals, not enough about communities.
If you are a hard-charging, Type-A "pusher," that's great! But you better work on being kind to yourself too.
It is hard to be a human. It is hard to care deeply. You've got to learn to love yourself and create space for your pain.
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1/“What would need to be true for you to….X”
Why is this the most powerful question you can ask when attempting to reach an agreement with another human being or organization?
A thread, co-written by @deanmbrody:
2/ First, “X” could be lots of things. Examples: What would need to be true for you to
- “Feel it's in our best interest for me to be CMO"
- “Feel that we’re in a good place as a company”
- “Feel that we’re on the same page”
- “Feel that we both got what we wanted from this deal
3/ Normally, we aren’t that direct. Example from startup/VC land:
Founders leave VC meetings thinking that every VC will invest, but they rarely do.
Worse over, the founders don’t know what they need to do in order to be fundable.
4/ So why should you ask the magic Q?
To get clarity.
You want to know where you stand, and what it takes to get what you want in a way that also gets them what they want.
It also holds them (mentally) accountable once the thing they need becomes true.
5/ Staying in the context of soliciting investors, the question is “what would need to be true for you to want to invest (or partner with us on this journey, etc)?”
Multiple responses to this question are likely to deliver a positive result.
Why is this the most powerful question you can ask when attempting to reach an agreement with another human being or organization?
A thread, co-written by @deanmbrody:
Next level tactic when closing a sale, candidate, or investment:
— Erik Torenberg (@eriktorenberg) February 27, 2018
Ask: \u201cWhat needs to be true for you to be all in?\u201d
You'll usually get an explicit answer that you might not get otherwise. It also holds them accountable once the thing they need becomes true.
2/ First, “X” could be lots of things. Examples: What would need to be true for you to
- “Feel it's in our best interest for me to be CMO"
- “Feel that we’re in a good place as a company”
- “Feel that we’re on the same page”
- “Feel that we both got what we wanted from this deal
3/ Normally, we aren’t that direct. Example from startup/VC land:
Founders leave VC meetings thinking that every VC will invest, but they rarely do.
Worse over, the founders don’t know what they need to do in order to be fundable.
4/ So why should you ask the magic Q?
To get clarity.
You want to know where you stand, and what it takes to get what you want in a way that also gets them what they want.
It also holds them (mentally) accountable once the thing they need becomes true.
5/ Staying in the context of soliciting investors, the question is “what would need to be true for you to want to invest (or partner with us on this journey, etc)?”
Multiple responses to this question are likely to deliver a positive result.
