Aubrey Marcus’s new “poem” joins Mikki Willis’s Election Night Ode (delivered at a prayer meeting for Trump in Austin) to form a new genre we can call Alt-Bro Epic (ABE).

ABE characteristics: 1) It has to sound like a sixth-grade school presentation by a boy who went to a poetry slam once and who has been told he’s God’s gift by life coaches. /2
2) ABE has to use the First Person Plural Omniscient to combine and conflate complex issues in a churning froth of unearned emotion that pretends to be universal while flattening all difference. Bromantic mansplaining that rhymes, sort of. /3
3) ABE positions the wealthy wellness influencer as the jejune bard of cultural and emotional reconciliation, after they have monetized COVID minimization and disinformation. /4
4) ABE must pretend to rise above porn while distorting, sensationalizing, and co-opting issues like CSA and poverty/starvation in the majority world, as well as racism and domestic violence. /5
Let’s play who wrote it? Mikki or Aubrey? The ABE conventions make it hard! /6
“After decades of being fed lies and fear,
we can thank the media for the way things appear.
By broadcasting propaganda, 24/7,
they've raised hell and socially distanced heaven.” /7
"The headlines
running down party lines
are the dealt drugs getting mainlined
carefully designed
to narcotize disfunction until we are resigned
to live a basic function.
Keep watching, pay taxes,
get vaxes and do nothing.
Just whine a little bit and drink more wine” /8
"20/20 is more than a code for perfect vision.
It is a year when humanity faces our most critical decisions.
To render our freedom to power hungry lunatics,
or cut the strings that keep us dancing to the puppet master's politics” /9
Everyone has the right to write poetry, and to keep it private. Look out for ABE to be a new front in the rebranding of the manosphere as a wellspring of heroic equanimity. Watch their followers praise their open, content-free hearts. /end

More from Culture

One of the authors of the Policy Exchange report on academic free speech thinks it is "ridiculous" to expect him to accurately portray an incident at Cardiff University in his study, both in the reporting and in a question put to a student sample.


Here is the incident Kaufmann incorporated into his study, as told by a Cardiff professor who was there. As you can see, the incident involved the university intervening to *uphold* free speech principles:


Here is the first mention of the Greer at Cardiff incident in Kaufmann's report. It refers to the "concrete case" of the "no-platforming of Germaine Greer". Any reasonable reader would assume that refers to an incident of no-platforming instead of its opposite.


Here is the next mention of Greer in the report. The text asks whether the University "should have overruled protestors" and "stepped in...and guaranteed Greer the right to speak". Again the strong implication is that this did not happen and Greer was "no platformed".


The authors could easily have added a footnote at this point explaining what actually happened in Cardiff. They did not.

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