Terrible things happen in Nigeria. We've lost the present and we want to lose the future.
I just left Transcorp Hotel Abuja, after my news analysis at Arise News TV. As I stepped to the lobby of the hotel, I saw a bevy of pretty young girls in their early 20s crowded in a corner.

There were all skimpily dressed as if there were commercial sex workers. The time was 10.30pm.
One of them rushed to greet me. “Good evening sir”. She was one of my students. I recognized her clearly because she had a slight disability and I paid attention to make sure she...
followed the coursework. I was shocked. I recognized three of those hotly dressed pretty young girls as fresh graduates of my department.
What are they all coming to do at this kind of Hotel at this hour and dressed in this manner? Of course, I think I know what it is.
A Nigerian politician or man of means may have arranged them for his pleasure, and those of his friends and acquaintances. Everyday, our girls are disoriented by these politicians who have neither shame nor conscience, because they have access to power and money.
We pride ourselves that we have a large youth population and that is a huge asset. But the truth is that we have a large hardware. The software is highly corrupted. Why do we intend to organize these adolescents into the life of immorality?
This reminds me of the experience I had as a special adviser to the Senate President. Once we went to open a new government house built by a Governor in one of the southeastern states. The Governor arranged a special reception for us.
When we got to the venue of the so-called reception, I was shocked. Tens of very young girls sourced from the nearby university; between 17-22 years, were already dancing with top government officials.
I screamed and accosted the majority leader of the State House of Assembly.
He boldly answered “Man Sammy, these adolescents are our counterparts”. Wow. What? I requested to be taken back to the hotel. That was the end of the reception for me. I couldn’t believe that someone will arrange first year students for an entourage that has the Senate President
and the Chairman of the Senate Committee on Education. We are finished.
These politicians have done more harm than you can ever imagine. They have destroyed the economy. They have destroyed infrastructure.
They have also destroyed the morality and the viability of our human capital. How can such young girls who are debased that early, rise up to be moral champions of tomorrow? How? Pretty difficult.’

SAM AMADI Ph.D

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1/ Here’s a list of conversational frameworks I’ve picked up that have been helpful.

Please add your own.

2/ The Magic Question: "What would need to be true for you


3/ On evaluating where someone’s head is at regarding a topic they are being wishy-washy about or delaying.

“Gun to the head—what would you decide now?”

“Fast forward 6 months after your sabbatical--how would you decide: what criteria is most important to you?”

4/ Other Q’s re: decisions:

“Putting aside a list of pros/cons, what’s the *one* reason you’re doing this?” “Why is that the most important reason?”

“What’s end-game here?”

“What does success look like in a world where you pick that path?”

5/ When listening, after empathizing, and wanting to help them make their own decisions without imposing your world view:

“What would the best version of yourself do”?