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Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig 5 years, 7 months ago 652 views

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So I bought two accounts on your service--one for personal use, and one for business use. Please react, large companies!

Microsoft: WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING OH MY GOD PLEASE KILL ME AND END MY TORMENT

Slack: You're my favorite two daily active users.

Google: Fuck your business account, why would you pay us? What is wrong with you?

LinkedIn: Has either account tried premium?

GitHub: Two accounts? Sure. Okay. Okay. Sure. Your green squares graph is gonna suck.

Amazon: there are disturbing and weird crossovers between them, like your MFA—but nevermind that. Every time you spin up a new AWS account you're New To Us and must be onboarded.

Apple: WTF is a business?!

Twitter: Your account is temporarily restricted.

Dropbox: Would either account be interested in some nonsense that has nothing to do with "a folder, synced everywhere?"

MongoDB: We lost both of your accounts. Oops.

Netflix: Between those two accounts, you currently have 40 profiles spread across all 6 continents we serve. This is... fine.

Oracle: We have no idea what a personal user account might be, but we're going to audit you just the same.

WebEx: Can we take you out to dinner? You're 40% of this quarter's net new sales.

OnlyFans: I'm sorry--did you say a business account? And you're not a sex worker? Can you please explain this to one of our product managers, because we're highly confused.

The IRS: We're going to audit the piss out of you just as soon as we can find an auditor who takes one look at this thread and doesn't quit on the spot.

More from Corey Quinn

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

So this #reinvent eve, I want to talk about "The Mug: A thread featuring this glorious bastard."

I've gotten a few questions to the tune of "what's @awscloud Hambone," "what's this mug you keep talking about" and "what the hell is wrong with you?"

That last one is from my parents, so we'll disregard it.

For #reinvent, AWS is "particular about slides" in the same sense as "an exploding sun is slightly warm." They send out a standardized PowerPoint slide deck template that all speakers are to use. It's usually fairly zany. This year's featured a rando line art drawing of a ham.

It also figured this drawing as well, but you don't make friends with salad.

So I labeled it "AWS Hambone," slapped it on a shirt and wore it for my keynote rebuttal, as one does.

I also inflicted this upon my child, likewise as one does.

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

So there's a lot of confusion about what Parler being kicked off of Amazon Web Services (@awscloud) means. Let me do a quick thread to explain it to folks who aren't deep in the technical weeds...

You use an app (in this case, Parler). There's a web site you can use, and apps you can download onto your phone via Apple and Google. Those three versions of the app all talk to servers (big computers) behind the scenes.

In the Olden Days, getting those servers took months. Then you had to sign deals with companies to host those servers--they take massive amounts of power, they run hot so air conditioning is a big deal, and they need a *lot* of bandwidth.

About 15 years ago or so, Amazon (the online bookstore) had a revelation and started AWS. The idea being that instead of needing tens of thousands of dollars to get those servers built up, and spending months on it, that they would rent you these servers by the hour.

"A credit card and a few clicks of a mouse later" you were basically able to spin up huge numbers of these servers.

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Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

If people add a letter to FAANG, the added letter is the company they work for.

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

And now a livetweet thread of a legal conference in the case of C21-31-BJR, Parler LLC v. @awscloud.

Parler suggests "AWS just has to flip a switch and Parler gets turned back on. Parler has been their customer for 2.5 years."

"They've met and conferred over some user content that violates not only Parler's user requirements, but also Amazon's." Yes, they'll do that, whether you want them to or not.

"I'm not on social media" says Parler's lawyer. "If I use any terms and you don't understand them, I can explain them your honor." Just go full bro and call it "dumbing things down for you" dude.

They're now saying an "algorithm" can solve their moderation problems.

Spoiler: it can not.

Corey Quinn
@QuinnyPig

Lest people think I've become too far lost in the Talking Head weeds this past #reinvent week, it's now time for me to livetweet my use of a new AWS service that was announced this week.

You probably get my re:Quinnvent newsletter. Here's the system I built that generates it.

Now that CodeGuru supports Python, let's turn it loose on the "build" subservice. This is a @goserverless stack. The subcomponent features 8 Lambdas function fronted by 11 APIs Gateway.

Yes, let's get started with it!

It starts with the correct option selected. Good for it, bad for CodeCommit's veneer of legitimacy.

More from Business

Travis
@coloradotravis

It's endlessly fascinating how economic datapoints get interpreted.

When I was in charge of a P&L, the guy who ran Finance for us and I had what we called the 'shelf plan.'

There were maybe 3-4 of us who knew it existed.

What's a shelf plan?
1/

Well it's a plan you keep on the shelf (full FP&A model), that you hope you never have to use.

It reduces forward hires, cuts back various line items (typically ad spend, travel, that sort of thing).

Oh, it also has a big fat RIF in there.

That's why we don't talk about it.
2/

Why have a plan instead of winging it?

Because this is where companies (particularly young companies) sometimes err. They do little cuts - 2-3% here and there, preserving as much headcount as they can, that sort of thing.

This is incorrect.
3/

If you're at the point where you need to make material changes to your forward P&L, at 2-3% RIF will be followed by another.

And another.

And this series of progressive cuts will cripple morale, incrementally reducing the productivity of the staff you retain to survive.
4/

And so the shelf plan cuts deep.

Your goal is to go from being a peacetime machine to a wartime machine, so you gotta lean out quick. Can't do that without a plan, hence the need to have one.

~30% cut is what you need.

And then you need to tell everyone left they're safe.
5/

We The Inevitable
@WeTheInevitable

Former CEO and future former Chairman of ATT RandaII Stephenson fun facts:
>>was chairman of Boy Scouts of America
>>was mentored by CarIos SIim
>>subsequently promoted to CFO of “southwestern bell company” (former name of ATT)
>>quickly resolved $30B in debt
>>is on CFR
😲

https://t.co/wWjV2t3bVB

And he worked for Bush telecoms ? Damn. This is a jackpot

I’m guessing This expIosion wasn’t just some expIosion

https://t.co/s0i05aaWXt

Silver lake

Silver Lake Senior Leadership

https://t.co/YLaUtP8lQa

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Irina Dumitrescu
@irinibus

I just keep being surprised by how many people expect all business to run as usual despite the fact that we're into year two of a worldwide pandemic.

Like.... anyone notice how many people's jobs got a ton harder? Or how many people lost their jobs, or the prospect of even being in the running for employment?

Anyone notice how many people now have massively heavier care responsibilities -- for children, parents, elderly relatives and friends, you name it?

Anyone notice the massive, unceasing level of stress that comes from mixed messages coming from govts, bungled safety policies and vaccination plans, endless lockdowns?

Every now and then I see someone miffed that some inessential thing hasn't gone as quickly or as efficiently as they'd have like, and I have to wonder -- are we living on the same planet?

Ezra Klein
@ezraklein

So I'd recommend reading this thread from Dave, but I thought about some of these policies, and how they fit into the whole, a lot, and want to offer a different interpretation.

It's very in vogue to bash California and this doesn't even reach to some things that deserve scorn, like the continuing control of the Western States Petroleum Association and the state Chamber of Commerce in policymaking. And yet-https://t.co/vHZ6GM7QF8
— David Dayen (@ddayen) February 11, 2021

I think California is world leading on progressivism that doesn't ask anyone to give anything up, or accept any major change, right now.

That's what I mean by symbolically progressive, operationally conservative.

Take the 100% renewable energy standard. As @leahstokes has written, these policies often fail in practice. I note our leadership on renewable energy in the piece, but the kind of politics we see on housing and transportation are going foil that if they don't change.

Creating a statewide consumer financial protection agency is great! But again, you're not asking most voters to give anything up or accept any actual changes.

I don't see that as balancing the scales on, say, high-speed rail.

CA is willing to vote for higher taxes, new agencies, etc. It was impressive when LA passed Measure H, a new sales tax to fund homeless shelters. And depressing to watch those same communities pour into the streets to protest shelters being placed near them. That's the rub.

Charlie Mungerilal
@CMungerilal

Diff between Bajaj Finance and HDFC bank customer experience

My friend who got loan from both says BAF charged him 4% higher interest rate than HDFC bank. But process of disbursement was so fast and simple that he got amount in his account in 2 days. While HDFC bank took 2 weeks

It’s all about cost saving against convenience/urgency. I think Bajaj Finance has a very good value proposition.

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श्रीमाली हितेश अवस्थी...
@HiteshAwasthi89

Sri Maha Bhairavar Rudhra alayam, Chengalpet, Tamilnadu

This temple is being constructed merely on the instructions from Bhairava by his devotee Shri Bhairava Siddhantham Swamy. The Temple is fully enshrinedin a transparent glass enclosure..1/n

with Rudrakshas on both the sides of the entrance This temple has a circular Sanctum Sanctorum which has twelve stepseach representing a sign of zodiac and after that twelve steps we find the supreme deity of this temple Sri Kshetra Paata Bhairava. 2/n

Beneath the Bhairava, in the lower level are installed the Ashta Bhairavas, SapthaRishis in the form of stones, and Saptha Kannis in the form of brass lamps. Thereare a number of little blue and white lights in the ceiling that is shaped like a dome.. 3/n

which give an ethereal atmosphere when switched on. The steps representthe twelve signs of the zodiac and when one steps over them to reach thesanctum sanctorum all the doshas pertaining to the horoscope are cleared onceand for all..4/n

The Sthala Vriksham ”Peepal Tree” which is grown on a pedestal, a trident which is considered as Bhairavi, Pancha Mukha Anjaneya, Prathyankara Devi, Subramanya, Rudra Vinayaga, Vaishnavi Devi, Naga Rudra, Eswara, Vana Durga etc. 5/5

#IncredibleBharat
#DekhoApnaDesh

Vibhu Vashisth
@VIBHU_Tweet

THE LESSER KNOWN MAHARANA OF MEWAR:RANA KUMBHA
Kumbalgarh Fort is one of most spectacular sites of India,atop a hill abt 3600ft above sea lvl in the https://t.co/LkjmzzBhE2's second largest wall is surrounding it.A fort wall second only to Great wall of China,still not so famous.

This longest wall of India stretches to almost 36Km and encompasses a few hills, many step wells and over 360 temples and palaces. Birth place of the Great Maharana Pratap, this fort is named after another Great Maharana of Mewar, who is not given his due in the History.

Builder of many architectural marvels like the Kumbhalgarh Fort, an erudite scholar, a patron of arts, music, culture & a great warrior was the Great Maharana Kumbha. Yet we don't know much about him. Let's get to know him a little.

Maharana Kumbha was the undefeated King of Mewar from 1433-1468CE.He never lost any battles &kept Mewar out of the reach of Islamic Invaders till the time he was alive. Born on Makar Sakranti to Maharana Mokal & Saubhagya Devi, Rana Kumbha was only 13 when he ascended the throne.

His father was killed by his own relatives in a political conspiracy. He was a powerful King about 8ft tall &charismatic personality,a hardcore Hindu Rajput who could shed his life for Hindu honour without thinking twice.He was an ardent skillful warrior who never lost a battle.

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Erik Torenberg
@eriktorenberg

1/ Someone emailed me asking how to break into VC, so I wanted to answer on Twitter where others could see and contribute to the conversation.

2/ “Being a VC” can mean a lot of different things, so it’s worth asking:

What actual activities do you want to do?

- Deep market analysis?
- Be in the flow of information and people?
- Make deals?
- Work closely w/ founders over time (e.g take board seats?)
- Manage capital?

3/ It’s worth specifying what type of VC you might like to become — as there are different archetypes. E.g.

- Benchmark (Lead series A/B - couple investments a year)
- First Round (Lead seed rounds, partner w/ a few companies a year)
- SV Angel (Make lots of seed investments)

4/ Continued:

Expa - Incubate companies

YC / Village Global - Build a platform to help entrepreneurs at scale

Do you want to join a firm or start one? There’s a lot to consider.

Different paths will require different skillsets & sets of experiences.

5/ Since the person who wrote the email is a young person trying to break into VC by joining a firm (and who doesn’t want to start a company), I’ll tailor this tweet storm to that goal. There’s some overlap.

katya adler
@BBCkatyaadler

Again, at such a key moment in UK and at such high political levels, evidence of deep misunderstanding of EU: The PM is under pressure in some quarters to delay #Brexit vote to allow her first to “improve” deal in Brussels BUT EU is determined not to budge at this stage

2) All EU leaders watching tomorrow’s vote. Of course they want to avoid a no deal #Brexit BUT they feel the deal - so painfully negotiated between EU and UK - is too fresh to re-open. Clarifications, yes but fundamental renegotiations, no.

3) The EU’s international reputation as a tough deal-maker is at stake here too. If Brussels now suddenly “gives in” to U.K. on EU red lines (eg backstop) then that would weaken the EU’s reputation in future trade negotiations with other non EU countries

4) Also on backstop the EU is unlikely to cave in to favour a relationship with a leaving member state (UK) against the explicit wishes and ignoring the deep concerns of a continuing member: Ireland.

5) Both the EU and the PM signed up to a guarantee to protect the border between Northern Ireland and the Republic of Ireland. If either the U.K. or EU can leave the backstop unilaterally then this clearly is no longer a guarantee.

$Anu Satheesh \U0001f1ee\U0001f1f3$

Anu Satheesh 🇮🇳...
@AnuSatheesh5

#Guruvayur_Krishna_Bhakthi 🕉
#Guruvayur
#Storytime
Beautiful Story of Guruvayurappan

Poonathanam Namboothiri was a great devotee of Guruvayurappan. One day Poonthanam was going to Guruvayur Kshetram. It was night time and eventhough Namboothiri was tired he continued to walk

Suddenly some thieves came and blocked his way. Poonthanam cried for Shri Krishna to help. Thieves snatched all valuables from him, but Namboothiri holding his Bhaghavatam book called Shri Krishna to help. That time a man came in a horse back and fought with thieves and protected

Namboothiri. Poonthanam thanked Krishna for helping him from danger and said to the man that "Shri Krishna has send you here and I don't know how to thank you". The man smiled and told that he is Mangattachan, minister of samoodhiris. Poonthanam once again thanked him and

gave his ring to Mangattachan as a token of thanks and continued his journey. He reached Guruvayur early morning for Nirmalya Darshan. Temple poojari came near him and told that Guruvayurappan came in his dreams and asked to hand over the ring to poonthanam.

When he opened Kshetra Nada poonthanam was surprised to see his ring on Guruvayurappan, which he gifted to Mangattachan. He understood that it was Guruvayurappan who came as Mangattachan to protect him. This is how Bhagwan treat his devotees.

Hare Krishna
🙏🕉🙏