breaking my social media fast, which may or may not exist anymore, to share something i found really really helpful from today's therapy sesh. i figured out why i (we?) have so much trouble celebrating our wins

so ive been in therapy for 100 years. still anxious, but im pretty sure i was born that way so i'll stay that way. still depressed too, which i thought id be cured of by now. aa few sessions ago we talked about what i think a return to health 'should' look like
initially i figured itd look like being the person i was before i got depressed. energetic, not needing pep talks to do shit like go outside, cooking everyday, working out at least 30 mins at least 3 days a week, calling my mom everyday, etc.
that session i realized that im a completely different person than i was before i got depressed. also the world has changed a lot & things are just done differently now. not allowing for those things had me reaching for shit that was impossible.
so i make some concessions but say that i *still* want to be able to do some things that i dont want to do. like i cant just sit on the couch and never move in the name of accepting who i am, which is A Bitch Who Don't Like To Move. i still want to be able to eve if i dont want
so im like how do i do it, whats the secret???? and she's like practice doing things you dont want to do. and i was like so... the answer to doing these things... is... to just... do it??

but the key word there is practice. i never think of having to practice 'normal' things
i almost joined the track team in high school until i found out they practiced everyday. thats the extent to which i do not enjoy practicing anything. i had big ol strong legs too. i coulda been a contender.

but the lady said practice doing things iont wanna do, so i have been

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Why is this the most powerful question you can ask when attempting to reach an agreement with another human being or organization?

A thread, co-written by @deanmbrody:


2/ First, “X” could be lots of things. Examples: What would need to be true for you to

- “Feel it's in our best interest for me to be CMO"
- “Feel that we’re in a good place as a company”
- “Feel that we’re on the same page”
- “Feel that we both got what we wanted from this deal

3/ Normally, we aren’t that direct. Example from startup/VC land:

Founders leave VC meetings thinking that every VC will invest, but they rarely do.

Worse over, the founders don’t know what they need to do in order to be fundable.

4/ So why should you ask the magic Q?

To get clarity.

You want to know where you stand, and what it takes to get what you want in a way that also gets them what they want.

It also holds them (mentally) accountable once the thing they need becomes true.

5/ Staying in the context of soliciting investors, the question is “what would need to be true for you to want to invest (or partner with us on this journey, etc)?”

Multiple responses to this question are likely to deliver a positive result.