If you struggle to take critical feedback, read this:

The common advice on this topic is more suited for the playground than the boardroom:

-> Don't take it personally
-> Don't get emotonal
-> Count to 10

WTF?

If you’re an accomplished professional trying to find your way to the top...

This is your roadmap.

1/ Picture Yourself

You're a mosaic.

Every experience, every mistake, every resounding success adds to the picture of you.

And you, being human, can grow & evolve.

The fuel for that growth?

Feedback

And the clearer you see yourself, the easier you can place each piece.

2/ Declare Your Intention

Don't wait for people to come at you w/ feedback.

Focus them where you want to grow.

-> Tell them your gap
-> Show them you're working on it
-> Solicit their advice
-> Tell them you applied it

Your desire + action = their perception of your growth.

3/ Ask For It

Use every interaction to improve.

Don't ask: What could I have done better?

Do ask: Do you think ___ landed? If no, why not?

Targeted:
-> Minimizes the onus placed on the giver
-> Starts a more natural conversation
-> Preempts other feedback
-> Focuses them

4/ Seek to Understand

Don’t force them to prove their views w/ examples.

Instead, ask for benchmarks of who does this excellently

Move from a binary good or bad to a relative scale.

Is this feedback about:

-> Moving from good to great?
-> Being wildly off the mark?

5/ Fascinated Not Frustrated

The feedback will not always make sense. It might not even be accurate.

But ask yourself:

-> What would have to be true for someone to experience me this way?

-> Have I heard something similar before?

Genuine curiosity encourages investment.

6/ Take it Personally

Did the feedback hurt?

Good, that means it hit close to home.

It got near a hard truth you already know but can't bring yourself to face.

You don't go to the gym and ask the trainer to go easy.

So why shy away from doing the real work here?

7/ Say Thank You

Good or bad. Accurate or inaccurate.

They had infinite choices of what to do with that moment, they spent it on you.

It may not always feel like a gift, but for growth it's invaluable.

So even if it takes a few deep breaths:

Give gratitude not attitude.

8/ Dots vs Patterns

Don’t overreact to one criticism.

It's just a dot.

A single observation you can choose to place in your mosaic or not.

But don't ignore patterns.

When similar criticisms keep popping up from different people, chances are it's you not them.

Remember: If you're serious about growth, you must crave feedback.

CEO's pay six figures to executive coaches to do exactly this.

Why?

Because w/ their seat atop the org, most people will not be fully candid.

The coach?

They only stay on if the CEO gets better.

So you want:

-> A number of thoughtful advisors
-> Guided by your development objectives
-> Watching with a keen, constructive eye
-> And willing to give you their unvarnished truth

How do you get that?

Here's an example:

Before a big presentation, find your biggest critic:

"Could you help me? I'm trying to improve my delivery. Would you mind giving me feedback after on my pacing & energy?"

You've primed them to work for you vs come at you.

Your critic is now your coach.

And when they offer feedback:

-> Have them put it in context (1-10 scale or letter grades can help)
-> Be honest w/ yourself if you've heard it before
-> Curiously try on what they have to say
-> Remember to say Thank You

Now own it. Do the work to turn their fuel into action.

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If you struggle to take critical feedback, read this:

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