Some public accountability over an argument that probably d…

Some public accountability over an argument that probably doesn’t matter but should exist publicly. To understand this feud you need to know a few things. This is my memory which isn’t perfect but is the context of what happened with me and @pinwheelempire (thread)

Just finished a deeply personal & educating private conversation with @GregoryMcKelvey. We both are committed to doing & being better in regards to ourselves & those around us. I thank him for taking the time to reach out, for us to learn from each other, & to open a dialogue.
— \U0001f384\u2744\ufe0f\U0001f941 Lil Drummer Boi \U0001f941\u2744\ufe0f\U0001f384 (@SwooshMcDuck) December 29, 2020

1. I was blocked by @pinwheelempire around 3 years ago. Something that actually really hurt as a life long Blazers fan. I thought it was because I tweeted stupid stuff about Stotts as a passionate fan during that playoffs that I don’t currently believe.

2. At some point I asked why and was informed by multiple people that the account was ran by a cop and that many media members disliked him. This was told to me many times by many people. I then believed that my race, and my public protesting of police was why I was blocked.

3. I do not work with police in any capacity because of personal trauma and historical oppression. I believe people should know when they are interacting with police. I also was/am salty about the block as a life long fan. I am still blocked.

4. Periodically I would tweet reminders that the account was ran by a cop, which I believed. Although part of my incentive was that I was hurt by the block as a fan. Recently I tweeted such a reminder which I believed especially pertinent given the current uprising.

5. I was then corrected by people involved who informed me that 1 out of the many people who volunteer their time is a cop but that most are not. I should have been public in my admission that I was wrong. The account is only partially ran by a cop, not fully.

Now, personally I would not run an account with a cop but I am not so pure that I believe anyone associated should be cancelled. However, the white man who corrected me and is involved also decided to try and hurt me by using my trauma with police as a way to slander me.

The above is what set me in a tailspin. I was triggered by this because I felt as though my race and work in the community was why I was blocked and was also being used as a tool to further cause me harm. Also, I work too hard to take disrespect lightly.

After my public posts, more people reached out with similar experiences as mine and also pointing out that there were incredibly problematic and racist posts made by the account. Further, one member of the collective who I did not previously know was involved tried to hurt me.

Also, I was informed that the collective of people who ran the page did not include any Black people. I find this to be problematic given the fact that they have racist tweets still up, blocked me for my politics, and cover a sport dominated by Black people.

I believe Blacks are victims of police violence at alarming levels. I believe I am one of those victims. I believe I was blocked by this page for fighting back against that. I believe that my traumatic experiences were then used to hurt me when I called out these other beliefs.

However, my belief that the page was ran by a cop is wrong. I was wrong. K am sorry. It is ran by multiple people who undoubtedly have differing views, some I do find problematic. Others are similar to mine. I discredited their work by not confirming who ran the account.

I also called the members of this group a klan which was a Freudian slip that I allowed to fester. They are not the Klan. Some are not white and some are not men. I am sorry if I hurt anyone with this dismissive remark. It does not reflect my views.

This all said, I still do believe I was blocked years ago by a cop for my political views that are informed by my race and experience with police. I believe the group has tweeted racist things. I believe the group is not diverse in the way it should be given the topic.

I also believe I was wrong to not confirm who runs the account. I was wrong on doubling down on trying to discredit the group because I was hurt. I was wrong to do any of it publicly and it is something I would never do to activists so I should not do it to anyone.

I have deleted most of my tweets on this subject as they don’t reflect how I feel but I want to be publicly accountable and as always my DMs are open. I can also repeat what I said. I did not delete to hide them.

I have asked @pinwheelempire to do the following things and I hope they take me up on it:

1. Do not delete the past racist tweets but instead mention them, explain them, be accountable, and do better. Also, do some introspection on why they occurred and were never addressed.

2. Be open and forthright about the prominence of a law enforcement officer in the group. Especially now, people deserve to know when they are interacting with cops. Especially when some topics involve cops and all involve a group heavily impacted by police violence.

3. Internally discuss unblocking fans, especially Black fans, who were blocked for their progressive political beliefs. Sports fandom is emotional and being blocked by anyone is not fun. Being blocked by your own community is hurtful and should be rectified.

4. Spark an internal discussions about why there is a lack of Black involvement, what that means, and how/why it can be improved. When tweeting about most Black people, there should be someone Black involved. I believe if there was, none of this would have happened.

5. Relay my sincere apology surrounding my characterization as an entire group as one cop and consider potentially unblocking me. I was wrong. I should not have hurt the people who were not involved in being cops, or blocking me.

Now with all that said, let’s be clear. I still believe that all law enforcement officers contribute to an oppressive system. I do not believe that all are inherently bad people but I do believe that people should be able to decide when they potentially interact with cops.

Anyways, all of this never had to get to this level. I was hurt and tried to hurt someone in return. I want to be better than that. @pinwheelempire is not a political organization so their inclusion of law enforcement is certainly different than if another organization did it.

Lastly, I have a very personal connection with The Blazers but also with my experience with officers and as a Black man. These things contribute to my trauma and I am working on responding to that trauma in more effective ways that don’t hurt others.

TLDR: I said mean things about @pinwheelempire because I was uninformed and I lashed out after the response to my mean tweet came off as racist. Also, I believe they can/should/will be better going forward. I hope one day we can be reunited even thought the cop and I won’t be.