1. Is Śiva really Bholenātha?
A commong sight during Sāvana ke Somvāra in north India is Hindu women offering Bilva Patra to Śiva liṇga at the nearby temple, offering jala & other offerings directly to Śiva liṇga by touching it directly or a long time.
2. There is scarcely any rule to this offering of pūjā. Women in sārī, suit and even western clothes offer everything they have brought with them directly to Śiva: milk, water, kumkum, haldī, bilva patra, sweets, fruits and much more with priest just managing the proceedings.
3. There is often a queue-less, order-less jumble of acts, sights and sounds in which women of all ages jostle with men and boys of all ages to reach the ‘pinḍī’, the Śiva liṇga and offer the pūjā.
4. Most people from the south, following tradition, where āgamas are still a working reality, at least in temples, and where many people follow caryā are offended, and not without reason.
Śiva also have rules of worship and approach, as other deities.
5. Śiva temple, like others requires certain rituals and customs which are inviolable. Śiva, like other deities, requires certain caryā from his devotees and thus cannot be just taken any way the devotees want. It is true that there is a way to approach him like any other deity.