breaking my social media fast, which may or may not exist anymore, to share something i found really really helpful from today's therapy sesh. i figured out why i (we?) have so much trouble celebrating our wins

so ive been in therapy for 100 years. still anxious, but im pretty sure i was born that way so i'll stay that way. still depressed too, which i thought id be cured of by now. aa few sessions ago we talked about what i think a return to health 'should' look like

initially i figured itd look like being the person i was before i got depressed. energetic, not needing pep talks to do shit like go outside, cooking everyday, working out at least 30 mins at least 3 days a week, calling my mom everyday, etc.

that session i realized that im a completely different person than i was before i got depressed. also the world has changed a lot & things are just done differently now. not allowing for those things had me reaching for shit that was impossible.

so i make some concessions but say that i *still* want to be able to do some things that i dont want to do. like i cant just sit on the couch and never move in the name of accepting who i am, which is A Bitch Who Don't Like To Move. i still want to be able to eve if i dont want